I’ve been feeling a bit lazy lately so I haven’t been blogging. But I’m finally in a much better mood than I was for the past month.
The post below was written a long time ago. I was clearly cranky when I wrote it.
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I am a very direct person…that is, I get to the point immediately in my dealings with people. This blog is about the only place I ramble about random ideas that are floating around in my head.
Brevity is my favorite word in the dictionary. When I want something I get to the point immediately. "Shooting the breeze" is not an activity I participate in. Below are some examples:
1. At the farmers’ market I go to a stall and pick out what I want rightaway. If I want to investigate something I stand far away and read whatever advocacy the farmers have written up ("we grow without chemicals", "we are the oldest farm in XYZ area", "we grow heirloom veggies", "we have tomatoes!"). This seems to alarm some farmers when I appear in front of them with all my stuff already picked out and no questions to ask. When I volunteer I get very annoyed at what I call the "tourists": they ask a million questions and then don’t buy anything. I am also really shy and I guess I’m afraid that the farmers will bite my head off if I ask questions, but its just not something I do much or very often.
2. Almost all my emails to anybody except my husband are very short. I prefer talking to people in person about philosophical ideas/concepts rather than typing it out on email. My sense of humor does not translate well in written form and I am a big reader of body language which is hard to do via electronic mediums. After working in a corporate job for a few years, I am also quite paranoid about leaving a paper trail unless its absolutely necessary.
3. In the workplace I use whatever method of communication is most useful. I make calls instead of typing up emails/memos/letters if its the best option. I do not discuss personal affairs at work. So far this method has not hurt me. If someone at work has made it a point to communicate something personal to me, I’ll be nice and ask about it: for example grandma who has cancer or child who is misbehaving. I suppose this is what makes one a good manager. But career wise, I want to remain on the lower levels of the bureaucratic ladder with no one below me to manage. Many of my friends follow this rule at work (birds of a feather), and I just think its tacky to talk about issues of a very personal nature at the workplace.
4. I don’t like having emotional/personal conversations via the telephone. If you’re going through a divorce I’d rather talk about it person. Obviously I compromise on this one sometimes since I have friends who live thousands of miles away from me…but in general I like face to face conversations when it comes to emotional issues. Again, this is because I read body language which is hard to pick up on the phone. And I do not use any of those video-phone thingies (or similar technology - I’m cheap).
My style of communication is at odds with whatever culture I’m usually living in. I don’t see any reason for the how are yous when I don’t particularly care about how someone is feeling. I am polite, and I’ve learned to respond to the how are yous.
This post is mainly a result of me thinking about what makes me like a book (besides good writing). The biggest concern lately has been on how much an author sticks to the main theme of the book. So if the book is about not buying stuff for a year, I expect to read about non-consumerism….not about how dissapointed the author is that people didn’t vote for a particular political party (unless that has something to do with nonconsumerism). If a book is about eating locally, it shouldn’t be about relationship problems. Unless cannibalism comes into play. If a book states that its about a variety of topics, I’m going to expect to read about a variety of topics. I am more forgiving about these standards when it comes to blog reading because its more of a dynamic work written by people who are themselves constantly evolving.






I just discovered your blog and am loving it!
I, too, hate having personal/intimate conversations on the phone. It wasn’t always true, though, I believe my SO has worn off on me and also, perhaps it’s my age? I seem to be less tolerant of idle chit-chat in my 40’s.
Comment by rapunzel — July 11, 2008 @ 10:00 am
I have to say, I’m kind of a little voyeuristically dying to read Plenty BECAUSE of your hilarious blog post about how you would get stressed out that the couple was going to break up!!!
Comment by arduous — July 11, 2008 @ 1:46 pm
Thanks Rapunzel! Hope you stop by again.
arduous, there was a lot of info in Plenty that I didn’t know about (like that disaster that wiped out thousands (hundreds of thousands?) of salmon because of an accident (acid spilling onto the waterways). Yet I had not heard about this at all when it happened (I was a bit of a news junkie at that time). Its worth reading though just to see how an urban couple (with access to a cabin in the wilderness) deal with eating locally.
Comment by Beany — July 12, 2008 @ 11:24 am
The relationship stuff in Plenty didn’t annoy me because I took it as part of the description of how they dealt with the challenges of the year. It only seemed out of line to me when they never brought it to completion — never addressed it by explaining what had caused it and how it got resolved. Instead it was presented more like “during the year we snapped at each other; once the year was over all was well again.” That just doesn’t make sense to me, and if =I= have any pet peeves about other peoples’ communications (whether in a book or in person or whatever), it’s when things don’t make sense!
Comment by Sue in the Western Great Basin — July 12, 2008 @ 12:51 pm
Clarity is a bit essential if an audience is involved…and I have very little patience for unclear or poorly written material. In fact I get annoyed at the same things that .
Comment by Beany — July 13, 2008 @ 9:36 pm