One Size Fits All

Yesterday I had a thought. Just one. I think the city pays waaay more attention to bums and skateboarders than they do to other residents of the city.

Just because bums sleep on benches and skateboarders use benches to grind means that now the public benches are either uncomfortable or non-existant. 

How to talk to a climate skeptic.

I have never been much of a consumer. Part of the reason is because I am lazy and being a consumer takes time and effort and money…stuff I don’t like to part with very easily. But there is another reason. I was lying around thinking about why I am a non-consumer and why so many people struggle with a consumerism addiction and it hit me: its because that’s what I was rebelling against.

Some teenagers get tatoos and pierce body parts or date sleazebuckets. Me as a teenager refused to jump on the consumer bandwagon. Why? Its because that’s what my mother did as a hobby.

Growing up, I wasn’t exposed to the marketing tactics that ensnared everyone. I was too busy reading my Enid Blyton and my Hardy Boys and my classics (Dickens, Dumas, Twain, Bronte) as well as all the naughty books I could get my hands on in the library (sex was an endlessly fascinating topic for me - a young girl in Catholic school). I had no interest in all the girly things that girls are interested in. To some degree I feel that I cannot relate to "normal" people today because I have no idea what normal people do or think. But where there were no clever marketers there was my mother. She was very good at pointing out my numerous defects and suggesting ways to hide those horrid defects.  She always bought my clothes because anything I purchased and wore (tee-shirts, jeans and sandals) was never very acceptable to her. Clothes apparently can influence people and branding is important in demonstrating taste to these outsiders. So she was always buying me stuff and telling me that it was from this brand or that brand. She also introduced me to the concept of wearing makeup. Since I was ugly (which she was fond of mentioning repeatedly) and had oily skin that was very dark (or tan), I had to dress up my face by painting it with colors. And caking my face with that crap somehow transformed me into a ravishing beauty. Except for the fact that dark skinned people with loads of makeup create a look that is more suitable on a mime artist. The fact that I am incredibly un-photogenic (with a permanent scowl) didn’t help at all.

So at every given opportunity I would refuse to wear makeup or wear the clothes that was purchased for me. I got a special thrill when I went out and exposed my hideous self to the unsuspecting world. My mother was horrified ("What will people think seeing you like that?"). I got great pleasure at not combing my hair (instead dreads!).

It was thus a huge relief when I finally began living on my own. Marrying someone with the same values as myself was even better. Now I had another weirdo to relate to.  

So what’s the point of this post? Well I have advice to dole out. If you want your kids to be non-consumers, you should take the consumer route. Fill your house with all sorts of useless crap where the only purpose of this stuff is to make your kids clean/polish/wash it every weekend (it creates discipline!). Repeatedly point out the defects in your kids (make some up…it’ll be fun). Have your entire self-worth based on crap you buy and your imaginary thoughts of other people’s perceptions of you. You’ll drive your kids straight into the land of tree-huggery. 

I am just staking out my claim here.

It seems that people in the media love making predictions and I thought I should get in on the act as well. After all this blog is a medium.

So forget the Goldman Sachs and the future president’s predictions, I am going to make a prediction that is guaranteed to come true.

I, Beany, predict that the price of oil per barrel will one day in the future hit $1,000. 

You may send me your bank account information so I can invest your money to capitalize on this prediction of mine. Thank you kind sirs and madams. 

I read a very well written and beautiful post recently that really made me think. Of course one of the reasons I related to the post is because I’ve felt like Megan many a time. And I’ve been at the other end of the spectrum unable to see someone’s point of view.

For example, unlike some people I know, I don’t get angry at the thought that some people are registered to vote under a different part than my own. I don’t get angry based on their choices on who (whom??) they vote for. I don’t get angry that my local politicians are behaving in a manner that I’ve come to expect of politicians - I am not let down. Basically politics bores me to tears. I think its like that debate over the FICO credit score…we have to pretend we care so we can do a bunch of nonactions while doling out time and energy and money. I see it as a nonissue…not worth getting annoyed over. And its odd how I’ve wound up with this state of mind. I remember practically frothing at the mouth nine or so years ago after reading the latest from Molly Ivins or The Nation magazine. However, I do get angry when people abuse children and/or animals. I do get angry that so many people drive and own cars in such an incredibly walkable city such as Philadelphia. And I get really furious when people play crappy music and subject me to listen to this crappy music.

I get very, very upset when people I respect pooh pooh my attempts to get rid of plastic in my life. It is apparently a very extreme measure not worthy of pursuing. Another person I respect decided to use Roundup on their yard and grow vegetables in that same yard. How could I articulate my thoughts, concerns and responses in a manner that wouldn’t alienate these people? How do I ask people to conserve resources, money and be kind to the planet when their biggest concern is which politician is going to be the next president or how their job is sucking the life out of them or how they’re going to afford their next ski trip?

When my friends get upset at the latest atrocity committed, why am I not as outraged? Well…I do get upset which is why I really limit my exposure to all forms of…current media, but does this mean I don’t care? If there is one thing I know about myself, its this: if I keep up with every single tragedy that happens on a day to day basis, I will not be able to function in society. I will get so depressed that I will be unable to do anything: eat, sleep, work, etc. I wouldn’t like myself to be that unfunctional person, so I choose what I read and what I see (to a large degree).

So in a nutshell, the way I can deal with these concerns is by letting go of my attachment (Buddha was quite wise), and Megan summarized her feelings as follows:

My less-than-stellar performance showed me that if I really want to fulfill my mission, I have to grow. We all do. If we want to create something new, we have to let go of what we think we know. That beautiful, elegant future we dream of? It lies outside the borders of the easy and the familiar. It is a brand new place whose gates won’t swing open to us until we learn to see and create in brand new ways.ﾠ

The question is: Can we lay down everything we think we are sure of and travel to that unknown land together? Are we willing to try and fail and try again?ﾠ

I’ve been thinking alot about alot of things…

I’ve learned that I am an introvert and think that the world would be so much more wonderful if everyone just shut up and read books all the time. And then blogged about it.

I read alot about peak oil. I think alot of things would become very inconvenient if oil was more expensive. I think the drum machine might be a bit more expensive to operate if electricity cost as much as it does in Alaska right now. Maybe there wouldn’t be so much crappy music? Hit and runs would become nonexistant perhaps?

I think all serial killers had cars…I imagine its a bit difficult to be a serial killer if you have to walk over to your victim’s house. (I’m having these bizzare thoughts because I recently watched No Country for Old Men). How did Jack the Ripper get around?

I watched a russian music channel recently and every singer was female and a Britney clone. I wonder if they were pleased with their song and dance routine before it was released. I’d be embarassed to have such lame music attached to my name.

How do punk rockers manage to maintain their rage and bitch about "The Man" when they’re making all that money and signing on to big record labels?

If everyone cooked their own food from scratch, I wouldn’t have so many severely obese people trying to squeeze in to try to sit next to me on the bus.

The smell of fast food makes me nauseous.

I’ve signed up for these online survery programs that pay a few bucks here and there but I don’t get many offers since I am not a typical American: no car, no tv, no supermarket purchases, no tv dinner purchases, no random modern convenience. I mean, I make my own laundry detergent and have been doing so for a year now. If survey companies want to pay me to discuss the latest boook I checked out from the library or how I spend my evenings in candle light - I’d  be a prime candidate. But that would probably put the PR industry out of business and the economy would tank and that would be terrible.

If Pats and Gino’s became environmentally aware of how much waste their business generated…would they buy sustainably raised beef? Would they serve fresh fruit juice in reusable glasses? Would Mr. Gino ride a bicycle to work?

Where are all those economists who used to go on and on and on about those supply demand curves? I think they need to talk a bit louder regarding the oil supply and demand. Maybe no one remembers their economics lessons because they, like me, thought economics was a snooze fest.

Baking soda as deodorant is very, very itchy. It wasn’t itchy initially but it is now. And has been for the past 3 days. I think I’m going to stop using baking soda on my pits.

This is surprising because I have tough skin. My husband says my skin is as tough as leather, but while that makes me proud…it doesn’t sound nice. In other words I have never had to worry about things irritating my skin.

Until now.

Update: I am no Fake plastic fish or Environwoman, but I do want to stop the plastic entering my home. Crazy mumma also experienced itching with baking soda and created her own roll on recipe. The ingredients all come with some sort of plastic however (the tee trea oil has a plastic cap for example).

I self medicate with humor. I am a fan of Dave Barry and Gene Weingarten, but the daily bad news and the realization of what the First Noble Truth means doesn’t uh….neutralize (??) the humor I get once a week. I wanted something on a more regular basis.

I found plentymag’s podcasts on environmental humor to be quite hilarious! I liked the one on on Monsanto (which I needed after watching this documentary), carbon offsets, Chinese products, and water conservation.

***

The name of this blog is also the name of a Frank Zappa album. So I think I need to put more Zappa references here. So here is a quote:

I’m putting this post in the Cut the Crap category. This is all the stuff I need to do before moving cross country in terms of getting rid of stuff.

April - Get rid of all books: sell, swap or donate.  Get rid of misc. junk.

May -  Get rid of/Donate extra clothing, shoes. Get rid of/Donate duplicate utensils and tools. Reduce CDs.

June -  Can we become a single computer household? Scan all essential documents currently in paper format. Shred/burn other confidential papers. Get all essential non-scannable paperwork (passports/Social Sec. card)  into a single zip folder. Clean all cruft off of computer.

July - Make sure all staples are getting close to finishing. Donate/Sell containers holding staples, packing boxes.

August - Get rid of furniture (tables, chairs, futon, couch, chest of drawers, computers, air conditioner, side tables, chest, kitchen stand). Give composter away to loving home . Donate clothes hangers. Donate/Sell bikes. Donate trash bins. Donate plant pots w/ and w/o plants.

I’ve been in a really crummy mood for a while now. I finally figured out what it is. So I am asking for your thoughts. To anyone who comes across this post. 

1. Dogs - Our backdoor neighbors have two dogs. They are some sort of boxer breed. Their yard space is as much as our (not very much, I’d say 10 feet x 10 feet). The dogs are left out all day long with a bowl of dog food (?) and a bowl of water which gets kicked and thus leaves dogs with no water all day. The dogs poop alot (which might explain the huge fly problem we have every summer), so that by the end of the day the yard is filled with dog shit. A lot of dog shit. The owners appear to clean the poop once a day and they seem to be gone all day. The dogs are chained to the wall and their movement is limited. They look really mangy even though I think their pure bred. Their skin looks unhealthy (warty like). I can see their ribcage…which I don’t think is normal. I can see this yard from one of our spare rooms. I am being honest when I say, that I am not sure if this qualifies as animal abuse. Do I call SPCA?

2. Cats - My neighborhood is filled with stray cats. I’ve counted at least 10 separate ones. When it got really cold I took one in (and wound up with cat poop on my plants) against landlord’s wishes. So do I report all these cats in?

3. Neighbor’s kids - This is the hard one…and its a very grey area. We have neighbors that live on either side of us that are related. There are about 10 or so kids varying in age from 15 to infant. The ones that share a wall with us are constantly arguing and screaming at all hours of the day. I hear kids crying but didn’t think much of it for awhile. The neighbors are civil with us, but they have gotten into some scary fights with other neighbors (dunno if their threats were meaningless).  Over the past few days I’ve seen two of the neighbor’s kids under 5 that were heavily bandaged. And it was upsetting. I don’t know if they were abused or they fell off the bed or a tree. I admit I’m jumping to horrid conclusions because I spoke to one toddler and asked her what happend to her mouth (I’m an idiot because she couldn’t respond because her upper lip and nose was taped with bandages), she keps saying "mom". She is about 3 or 4. The one mom (and her mom who lives with her) is a raving banshee and there has not been a single night in the time I’ve lived here when she has not spent her night screaming at someone in her house.

I will also admit that if the above does warrant me calling some sort of authority figure, I am afraid of getting involved legally. I am afraid of signing statements or testifying, because I am surrounded by crazies. There has been gunshots at night in front of my house a few months back and apparently the street one block away is somesort of drug den for coke dealers. And there are apparently ex-cons living all over my neighborhood. Yes. Ghetto.

Do I do something? Do I not do anything? If I should do something, how do I go about doing what I should do.  

The one mom who is constantly hollering at her kids had another baby. I cannot describe how much this enrages me. 

Well, March is over. So how did I do on the Trim the Fat challenge? Eh.

1. Spend no money unless necessary - Despite my desire to hold off buying new pants, I didn’t hold off. I purchased a pair of curdroy pants from the thrift store as well as a long flowy pretty skirt (part of a very old attempt to be more feminine). Husband purchased new black pants for PT job as thrift store didn’t have any.

An aside: Also I am admitting it here loud and proud that I love farmer style clothing. I love plaid. I love curdroy. And after a discussion from some of my female friends this weekend, I love overalls (don’t own any right now). Friends are endlessly amused at the number of plaid shirts I own, but there is no denying it. I love plaid. It covers the dredded chest headlights of which I am a constant victim to, and it covers up the size of chest acreage.

2. Leaner food consumption - This was a complete failure. We went out to eat twice (then paid for it dearly with my food poisoning episode which resulted in me going without food for over 2 days…so there was some leaness here). I also got many containers of orange juice and first set of organic oranges. I really need to figure out what we can and cannot eat based on moral, ethical and societal issues. Its all in my head and since I have a bad memory, this is not a good reliable source. And I ate almost no greens.

3. Less electronic stimulation - As I’ve mentioned on other blogs, we went back to candle light nights during the weekends after Green Bean posted about Earth Hour. This meant that I couldn’t read before bed, but I definetly was able to drift off into sleep easier. I also spent nearly every weekday not using my computer at home. I tried to have one completely free tech day at home. This is challenging because friends have learned to only communicate via email since we don’t have a landline and don’t use our cell phones too much. This is difficult in making constantly changing plans.

4. Trim my bodyfat - This turned out to be unexpectedly challenging. On one hand, I lost about 5 lbs by puking all over the bedroom (on the carpet!) and bathroom over the past few days. So I am mildly alarmed. But I did make an attempt to bike more. For one, the weather was nicer. However….this may just be me and my frustration coming from living in the same place for too long…but the drivers in this city of brotherly love are impossible!!! The blocks are so short, so why do they speed up between blocks, honk and scare us out of our skin? Why don’t drivers check their rear view mirrors or side view mirrors before opening up the door and nearly dooring me (or poor husband who did get doored). Why are tinted windows legal? Why do I have to breathe from a tail pipe? We got so frustrated that we’re taking a break from riding. 

And yes, this means I am apprehensive about living in LA. But I want to try out the city for at least a year. At least there will be a whole new set of a$$holes to deal with. So it will be exciting. I am also trying really hard to be positive and happy, but I am still a grumperella.

I broke my husband’s USB key last week in a manner that will just take too many words to describe (I insist on using the computer case/chassis as a foot rest and my foot was close to the usb slot). Since I felt bad I offered to buy him a replacement so off we went to Staples.

While at staples, I realized that I had a USB key that I had purchased a year back to backup my schoolwork. I offered to give it to him as I don’t use USB keys to back up stuff (I back my data up on remote servers). So I was able to avoid buying an item and most importantly didn’t spend money.

When I become a Buddha I will be known as Shakyamoney seeing how much I obsess over money.

An excerpt:

One frigid March morning last year, federal agents raided a factory in this old whaling town, arresting hundreds of illegal immigrants as they sewed vests and backpacks for U.S. soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Most were shackled and sent to a detention center in Texas, where they faced rapid deportation unless they could post thousands of dollars in bail — money they didn’t have — to buy time to mount a defense.

Then, a mystery benefactor appeared. The anonymous donor ponied up more than $200,000 to spring 40 people from detention.

The payments, which until now haven’t become public despite extensive news coverage of the raid itself, came from Bob Hildreth, a Boston financier who made his millions trading Latin American debt. He was "infuriated" at the televised images of workers being shipped to Texas, he says. Helping them make bail is "payback."

Inspired by Xin Lu, here are 5 reasons I like public transit, and 5 reasons I dislike public transit:

5 reasons I like public transit
1. I can catch up on sleep
2. I can do a lot of reading
3. Its free (100% paid for by employer)
4. Safer
5. Entertainment (I think Philadelphia is the only city that has such a high ratio of loonies to sane people. I count myself as a sane person)

5 reasons I dislike public transit
1. No control on time it take to get somewhere
2. Motion sickness
3. People who take up more than their allotted space (determined by me) of one seat with their ass.
4. Smell of pee
5. The fact that there is no discrimination against loud people